The pandemic has affected couples in various ways, and the results are contingent upon several factors.
We will address a few of them here.
First and foremost, imagine a couple who prior to the pandemic has earned a fantastic living, and everything is running smoothly. They have never had financial trouble. Then, Covid-19 hits and they both lose their jobs. They are quarantined together and have never had this situation in their lives. How will they cope? Will they experience the worst stress possible because they cannot pay their mortgage? Will their relationship fall apart without the cushy lifestyle? Will they seek outside help?
Now, imagine a couple that has been operating in an avoidance mode, never having touched on their problems, and now they have come face-to-face with them. Under quarantine, the problems are coming in rapid successions daily. Since they have never dealt with their issues, the friction is unbearable. They may or may not be able to endure the relationship for another minute. Are they both willing to keep their relationship intact? The chances are good if they are both willing to seek help with a professional therapist to iron out their problems.
Domestic violence has escalated during the pandemic, but it is not because the physical violence suddenly showed up. It is because the perpetrator is quarantined with the victim. If the perpetrator has never sought help, or the therapy has not worked, this is an extremely dangerous situation. To leave a dangerous situation is always recommended. Ask for guidance on how to do this safely!! It is imperative to seek counsel because most victims will tell the perpetrator they are leaving, and sometimes that alone has a devastating outcome.
Who are the couples that thrive during a pandemic?
The couples that have already been through trying situations, have been together for years, and are emotionally mature have thrived during the pandemic. Retired couples that are used to being home together have a high success rate. Couples that have savings and are solid in their relationships showing signs of emotional security and have evolved together on many levels. It seems that the couples who have thrived during the pandemic are the ones who have a long history of overcoming obstacles, excellent communication styles, nurture each other, and a good therapist in their world to help them work through any challenging times that may come their way.